So without him knowing it, you’ve been planning on marrying G-dragon for a whole year now. And in your stalker mind, you’ve even dreamed up your own wedding! Well if it ever becomes a reality, make sure you know what’s expected of you if you’re marrying a Korean! (Weirdo :P)
Note: This is a list of common expectations for when Koreans marry other Koreans. But of course if you’re a non-Korean, you will become a multicultural family, and that means your Korean lover and his/her family will have to adjust to you as well. So not all may apply.
1. You’ll Need Mommy and Daddy’s Permission
“Son, don’t you be marrying no crazies!”
So you’ve been dating that Korean for a while now and you’ve even got the whole Korean style proposal thing done. The girl’s got the ring and the boy’s got the swag. Congratulations! But it aiin’t official yet. Although getting married is about love, in Korea, many people also see marriage as a union of two families. And that means most marriage plans are on hold until the scary moment when both sides of the family meet. The families of the potential bride and groom will get together for an official dinner at a nice restaurant to make sure no one’s getting married to a family of crazies. And even if it’s a real life Korean drama love story full of childhood first kisses, life threatening diseases and sacrificial eye transplants, if the parents say no, then the wedding might not happen. (Of course, people sometimes go ahead and do it anyway. :P)
2. Parents will Pick up the Tab
“Daddy, Can you buy me a wedding?”
Weddings are expensive ordeals in any part of the world, and people everywhere don’t hesitate to spend butt loads of money on that one special day. And of course, weddings can be very expensive in Korea too. But if you’re still at the bottom working your way up to the top manager position at the local McDonalds, don’t worry too much. In Korea, most young people are broke too. That’s why most families will pay for their share of the wedding costs. That means most brides and grooms in Korea will not pay for the wedding themselves, but their families (parents) will. Korean parents see marrying off their children as their very last duty as a parent. Goodbye, so long, fare thee well young child. It’s a crazy butt load of money (see #3), but they’ll get it back. Big time (see #7).
3. Splitting Wedding Costs is Crazy Complicated
Or just avoid by marrying a Samsung heir
Wedding costs are always tricky arrangements for any marriage, and that’s why most families will figure out things amongst themselves (i.e. if one family is richer than the other, they may offer to cover more of the costs). So if you somehow convinced the heir to the Samsung empire to marry you, you’ll most likely get the most bomb wedding ever for basically just being an awesome husband or wife. For the rest of the not-so-lucky 99.999941%, many Korean families will split marriage costs like this:
Groom Side | Bride Side |
---|---|
Wedding Ceremony (50%) | Wedding Ceremony (50%) |
Honeymoon (50%) | Honeymoon (50%) |
Apartment/Housing – the home itself (100%) | Furnishings like furniture, appliances, etc. (100%) |
Yemul (예물) – Wedding gift for the bride | Yedan (예단) – Wedding gift for the groom’s family |
Splitting wedding costs can be crazy complicated and that’s why we need the scientific chart above. It’s easy enough to see the wedding ceremony and honeymoon are usually split down the middle. But the groom’s side typically provides the payment for the home/apartment, and the bride’s side usually provides all the furnishings inside the home. Fair and simple enough to follow right?
Ok, now see if you can follow this! The gifts involved might be the cultural part you might not have known about. Yemul (예물) comes from an old tradition of giving a bridge wedding gifts of red and blue yarn. Unfortunately for modern day cash-strapped grooms, that usually translates to a matching jewelry set: diamond ring, earring and necklace (or other jewelry). But brides return the favor with yedan (예단), a gift for the groom’s family, typically a cash gift that equals 10% of the housing costs as well as gifts for the family such as nice silverware, bags, jackets, etc.
Of course, none of this is set in stone as it’s different for every marriage (especially true for multi-cultural marriages!). This one you’ll have to talk out with your future Korean spouse/in-laws.
4. You Might Not Get that Cool Korean Name You’ve Always Wanted
Unofficial ones are still gravy tho 😛
In many places in the world, it’s common for the bride to take the groom’s family name. Ms. Smith becomes Mrs. Johnson in many places everyday. But if you’ve ever made up a Korean name for yourself because you think they just sound so darn cool, your dream of having an official Korean name might not come true. In Korea, brides keep their family names, even after getting married. That means even if Seonmi Choi marries Kyungsu Park, she will still keep the name her daddy gave her, Choi. But if you’re kind of creepily obsessed with having an Korean name, there’s no law against it. You can still do it at city hall. 🙂
5. Holidays Might mean Work (for Women)
Follow orders from bossy Korean aunts
Now that you’re married to the love of your life, you’ll probably be spending time with his family on the big national holidays. And the two big ones out of the year, Chuseok (추석) and Seollal (설날), are typically when families gather with their aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents, the whole shebang with lots of people and lots of food. But in most Korean families, women are in the kitchen all day to prepare the food. If you’re a woman that’s married into a Korean man’s family, don’t worry too much. It’s usually pretty fun to talk with the other ladies of the family while preparing the food. And even if you don’t have any idea how to do anything, there’s usually a bossy aunt in every family that takes over the kitchen like she’s running an army.
Tip: For Koreans, a new female family member not helping out in the kitchen isn’t always the best. So even if you’re all thumbs when it comes to cooking, try to offer your help (if you’re trying to get on their good side!).
6. New Years Mean Less Money
In exchange for hardcore bowing
Just like in many Asian countries, New Years in Korea (Seollal – 설날) is a time for little kids to receive cash envelopes from their elders to bring to school and compare with everyone how much they got. If you’re Asian, you know how awesome it feels to have envelopes piling up in your back pocket. But for all you non-Asians out there that’s never experienced counting that stash of New Years money in some corner when no one’s looking, sorry to say that you’ll only be counting the money you’re giving out. That’s because if you’re married into a Korean family, that means you’re part of the adult side. And even though you’ve never received money as child, you’ll be expected to give money to your own kids, as well as your nieces and nephews. At least they give you a hardcore New Years bow in return.
7. You Might Have to Live with Parents (Again)
Korean mama food
You thought it was over when you moved out didn’t you? Well remember when your Korean in-laws paid for all your crazy wedding expenses that almost mortgaged the house? Well they’re old and retired now. And for Korean families with more traditional values, many sons and/or daughters will invite their parents to live with them when they reach an elderly age. Although this is a changing trend in Korea, and many Korean families just tend to get the elderly parents their own home/apartment nearby (if they can afford it), if the Korean family that you married into has more traditional values, you might have to live with the in-laws for a while, which is not necessarily a bad thing. You’ll get real Korean mama food and a someone to help take care of the kids, too :).
To learn more about dating and marriage in Korea, check out our ebook:
How to Navigate Korea’s Unique Dating Culture: The Must-Have Guide for Successful Relationships
If you’re going to a Korean wedding, here’s the gifts you should give:
Korean Culture Says Buy These Gifts!
277 Comments
I think Jungkook and Cheng Xiao will be married
Haha
Are you real jimin?. Please tell me.if you are real jimin,you go to meet J-hope,and tell him.priya from India.she love you .she is waiting for you only.I wanna see him.but I know,I can’t see him.but I hope,I will be see him very soon.then I learn Korean language.Already I know English and Tamil languages.but I learn Korean language for you only baby.love you.bye.
Agreed with you ..
But I would like to meet you
You are the most amazing person in the whole world.
I love you smiling and you naughtiness
I love you eyes ,lips, nose , I like Everything on you
I would like to know if you would like to come over and meets.
OH MY GOD
LMAO This post reeks of someone so offended that some people admire Korean culture. Can’t get any snarkier than this. I guess just disregard the fact that there are people who fall inlove regardless of race and one just so happens to be Korean.
Don’t worry pal! Not everyone is creaming their underwears for Kdrama and Kpop lol. Calm your tits down.
why do you sya that? Ive been married to a Korean for 20yrs and I can say this article is 100% spot on
Hey! I am from India and i want to just marry a South Korean girl, so am I eligible for marrying a korean girl?
Yes
Me too I want to settle in south korea…and want to marry a korean man….god bless me….😭😭😭
I hate Asians!
Too much hatred is not good for your health.
Why 😒😒
Geesh what we do to you
And I hate people like you ! Go and make love to yourself !
Well can I marry a South Korean boy. I am an Indian girl.
I hate you!
You’re racist attitude will reflect on your future.
Go fuck yourself and leave people alone 😀
No one likes a racist person. Go away
That’s too rude
Don’t worry Bitch we hate racist people like you 👌😜
Keep going let see till when u’ll be up to that 😊
I hate you 👀 dumbass
Why???
Then why are you here just to inform us that u hate Asians……we don’t care honey.
This is god damm funny hahahahah lmfo, so funny. I almost fart cuz lauphing out so loud. I totally agree cuz I am Korean and I am married hahahahaha
im a filipina,i really love korea,koreans,and culture so no matter how hard the situation it is i will go to south korea and marry a korean. i dont know why i really love them.
I am in 20s I will marry Daesung of Bigbang is my goal before enteriing in 50s because I am a Filipino woman who prefers marry with Korean man
Iwant to marry with korean boy bcuse I love korea and I like the people when they getting closer and free minded I never seen korea country but it’s wish and Iwant to settle in korea country.
Meee tooo 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞
I’m a Indian but Iwant to settle in korea 🇰🇷😘
My wish I am marry Korean boy because he is intelligent and respect for girls.
Korean is intelligent and respect a girls that why I like korea and Korean. I will marry a Korean boy.
Mee tooo
Me too 😌❤️
Mee too same
are you from south india??
This is nothing different than Indian wedding. I found it same lol. I just hate those bossy People and can’t understand them. Also, I don’t know even a bit of cooking. I don’t think so marrying a korean will be good for me. Still I love Korean so want to atleast date a Korean boy. 🙃
I want to marry a South Korean or Thailand girl I’m from India
I have huge crush on jissooooo👑❤️
&lisaaaa👑❤️
Bcz they are very pretty & humble. Cute. Beautiful charming. Kind hearted. Nice personality.
So Im interested in marrying a this type of girl
I am from Australia
I want to marry a south korean boy..i’m from sri lanka and i want to settle in korea.because i love korea .❤️❤️
I want to marry a Tzuyu
like your post. It is good to see you verbalize from the heart
i have a korean boyfriend 🤣 and he’s said multiple times he wants to marry me aaaa he’s so cute. also the amount of kpop stans .. i love kpop but like i don’t want to marry a kpop idol lol
Awwnn….so happy for u.i really love them too,the culture and the language,its intriguing.
I can only talk on behalf of my personal experience because I know this does not apply to every Korean man and there are many men in the world that are the same. But my experience marring a Korean man has been so horrible. I have never regretted anything in my life such as this marriage. Hopefully we can get divorced soon. He’s disrespectful, he thinks that because he doesn’t drink any alcohol anything like law he does does not make a bad husband. He likes to scream at me when we’re alone but I front of his dad he’s the best son ever. I’m about to put a cam so when I present my divorce I can show his dad what type of son he has. Maybe dad will give him a slap in the face because of embarrassment.
I want to visit Korea and I want to know more about their culture 📢
Never thought of his parents meeting my parents 🥺🤭😳🤯
same 🥴
Funny, Korean men can’t be all good, just like other countries if you find one gentleman from Korea marry him and crown him ur king.
Hi…..I’m from India and I want to settle in Korea so…is that possible for me?
mike for marry
I’m from Bangladesh. And I want to marry a South Korean boy.
Ladies and Gents if you wanna marry a Korean, plz just give it a try. I wanna see more international couples here. 😛
lol the thing is that its kinda embarrassing marrying someone with different culture than you. but at the same time i think its good to meet different cultures and people.
My name is ola . I am from Nigeria , my wish is to marry a Korean man . If you can help me to make dream truth I will be really glad ☹️☹️. My WhatsApp number.2348088718152
My wish to marry a Korean boy
Imarried a korean man and we have a lovely daughter now me at the age of 50 he is 60 we met injapan i am from canafa
Now he has no money and expects me to sponsor him for housing
Someday I will find this post and reply to my own comment “I did it! I finally marry the man of my life” Bless me Lord, with this man. 🥰❤️
I wish I could choose my next life and born in South Korea as a Korean woman 🥰
Interesting I have a friend in her 50s who would like to marry a Korean man.
your writing skills is good . quite impressive